Thursday, 17 July 2014

The Birds and The Bees

People who know me a fair bit will most likely know that I have a knack for attracting the Odd. By which I don't mean odd people (that happens without saying…), but odd circumstances that don't happen to many other people.

I always seem to provide entertainment to my family and friends when narrating yet another "unique" tale from my life and times… today I am going to share one such story on the blog.

Frankly, the incident shouldn't have surprised me too much given my track record, but a few days later and I am still oddly amused by the aerial invasion upon me. Minding my own business and preoccupied by the 50 degree sweltering Dubai heat, I was outside the Mall of the Emirates and trying hard to locate my designated chauffeur. With the sun over my head and playing a game of cat and mouse with him, I was suddenly distracted by a loud sound coming from overhead. Squinting up, I saw the source of this strange noise - two birds flapping about animatedly. I resumed my call, looking around frantically for the black vehicle that would rescue me from the insane heat. What happens next ? The cackle gets louder and i feel 4 claws scratch my head!! Good Lord - attack of the pigeons?! So I start walking faster toward the closest building where I could get some shelter. Still a 100 meters away, I break into a jog….the cackle gets even louder and with a second swift swoop, the bird does it again! So now I run near the closest car and duck low into the ground, the bird continues to stay onto me and is now flying down low to reach me and manages to get dangerously close………………

I am almost down flat, sticking as close to the ground as I can get without having to actually lie down. Additionally, I'm using my handbag to cover my head and face from the evil, flying drones. A few more moments in this uncomfortable position and I hear the flapping and cackling get fainter - I have managed to fight the enemy off. Hurrah!

By this point, the crowd waiting at the porch of the hotel had noticed this peculiar sight and I had attracted the kind attention of a valet who rushed to my aid. I jumped up and dusted myself off brusquely, thanked him and went on my way, nervously making it to a covered shelter. I spotted the car and quickly dived right in and requested to speed out of there!

It took me a few moments to assimilate the awkwardness and hilarity of the event that had just transpired. I checked, and then double-checked my head to be sure that the angry bird hadn't left something behind! And to my relief, I was clear of any kind of deposit. Every time I wear the yellow blouse that I wore on the fateful day, I recall this incident and look into the sky, making a silent prayer to the Bird Gods to be gentle to me when I go out.

As usual, this has become a terrific story to narrate and I have recently used it to liven up a stuffy group gathering that I was a part of. Comic relief always helps. As they say "laughter is the best medicine"; and laughing at one self is sign of positivity and maturity. Glad to note that I am able to do it all the time….you should try it some time too.


  1. hahah from Odd birds to Angry birds.. no one can seem to resist the sunny disposition of our lovely lass! xo

  2. was expecting a lesson on the bird and bees with new insights from ur summer vacations .... disappointed!